What are the odds I could find the sum of numbers from 1-100?

I'd say it's fifty fifty

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What did the baker say after he found the dough he had lost?

That's just what I kneaded!

What does a pediatrist do when you ask them which body part they find most interesting?

They admit de feet.

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What did the number 0 say to the number 8?

Nice belt.

Why did Microsoft skip a number when naming their new operating system?

Because 7 ate 9.

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Why was Phil Collins......never a good betting man?

Because he always went Against All Odds.

What were the odds that Matt Damon made it off Mars?

Astronomical

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What's the best way to sum up the 90's?

90+91+92+93+94+95+96+97+98+99=945

What did the asian parents call their retarded son?

Sum ting wong