What did the Australian say to the two people fighting over bread?

It's stalemate

How many didn't?

Ten. (Shame this one doesn't work too well for reddit - the funniest part of this joke is the third punchline enjoying people struggle to understand what the hell you're talking about.)

Why are organ donations low?

Because most people have pianos

Fight Jokes More Fight Jokes

Why does everyone start to fight the day after Christmas?

Because it's Boxing Day!

Who would win in a fight, Michael J. Fox or Taylor Swift?

Michael J. Fox he would just shake it off.

Bread Jokes More Bread Jokes

What did the toaster say to the bread?

I want you inside me.

What did the oven tell the slice of bread?

You're!

Australian Jokes More Australian Jokes

What did the masterbating Australian mortician do?

Cremate

How does an Australian call his friend from the Czech Republic?

Czechmate