What did the knife say to the pretty lady?

Nothing, she knew what was coming...

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know if you are a necrophiliac?

You get mourning wood

How do you know when you're turning 40?

When your candy jar is filled with Tums..... My wife just came up with that one... Birthday is next week.. Ugh

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What side of the American flag are the stars on?

Both sides. Came from my FIL on this Memorial Day.

Why did the pig have ink all over his face?

Because it came out of the pen.

Knife Jokes More Knife Jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road with a knife?

Because it saw Lena Dunham on the other side.

What's the difference between toilet paper and a knife?

Oh, you don't know I won't ask you to wipe my bum then.

Pretty Lady Jokes More Pretty Lady Jokes

What do you call a pretty lady on the arm of a drummer?

A Tattoo.

What did the knife say to the pretty lady?

Nothing, she knew what was coming...