What do Congressional Republicans and ISIS in Afghanistan have in common?

Their first act since arriving was to go after the elderly.

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Isis Jokes More Isis Jokes

What's the easiest way to get a virus into ISIS computer systems?

By sending them executables.

Why doesn't ISIS attack Israel?

Same reason children don't attack their parents...

Afghanistan Jokes More Afghanistan Jokes

What is Call of Duty called in Afghanistan?

The Sims

Why are there no Wal Marts in Iraq, Iran, or Afghanistan?

Because there are already too many targets. (credit: some old veteran bum looking guy sleeping on a bench at the police station I went to today.)

Arrive Jokes More Arrive Jokes

What did the dyslexic traveller say when he arrived at an unknown station?

Whoops, wrong sub.

What time does Sean Connery arrive at Wimbledon?

Tennish

Republican Jokes More Republican Jokes

How are the homeless like votes?

Republicans have them thrown out.

How do you pump a Republican for information?

With a plunger.

Act Jokes More Act Jokes

What should PMS be called?

Ovary-acting

What do you call 2 ducks who walk like, act like, and believe they are geese?

A paradux