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What do Tim Cook and the iPhone 6 Plus have in common?

They both made the news for not being straight.

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I Phone Jokes More I Phone Jokes

Why did John Snow get an iPhone?

For the watch.

Why are you letting people touch your new born?

I don't let people touch my new iPhone

News Jokes More News Jokes

What's worse than your doctor telling you that you have gonorrhea?

Getting the news from your dentist

Who reads the news AND makes coffee?

Katie Keurig. (I know the setup might need some work but I just like the punchline I made up.)

Tim Cook Jokes More Tim Cook Jokes

What does Tim Cook have for breakfast in the morning?

Not Apple Jacks

What's Tim Cook's new nickname?

Jack the Ripper