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What do you call an Earl Grey that likes role play?

Not-tea

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Who in the organisation likes cats the most?

The purchaser.

Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear?

Because he liked sole music!

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Why do hipsters burn their lips when they drink tea?

Because they drink it before it's cool.

What should you wear when drinking tea?

A tea-shirt.

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What book does the Queen of England read to get herself into a raunchy mood?

50 Shades of Earl Grey

Why was Karl Marx arrested for brewing a cup of Earl Grey?

Because all proper tea is theft.