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What do you tell a person with two swollen eyes?

Nothing, you already told 'em twice.

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Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What do you call a person who teaches you the art of farting?

A tooter

Who's the most unpopular person at the Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch football match?

The person who shouted "Give me an L!"

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a scientist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce unionized.

How do you tell who the extroverted engineers are?

They're the ones who look at YOUR shoes when they talk to you.

Them Jokes More Them Jokes

What does a slave owner do with his slaves when he's finished with them?

Races 'em.

What did the computer do with his overgrown gardens...?

Mowed 'em.