What do you use to buy drinks?

Bar tender

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What will you be having to drink?

Harambe: I'll have just ice. Bartender: Just ice Me: Yes, justice for Harambe.

What does an alcoholic ghost drink?

BOO'S.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How do you split Rome in half?

You use a pair of caesars.

What's your cell phone?

IPhone. - No, I meant the number. - It's a 6. - No, to contact you. - I don't use it for that.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Where do Sikhs buy clothes?

Turban Outfitters

Why did Julius Caesar buy crayons?

He wanted Mark Antony!

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What did Bea Arthur whisper in her lover's ear?

An elaborate fantasy in which she is in prison and tries to escape by chewing through the bars of her cell.

What did the physicist say to the two women he was trying to pick up at the bar?

Do you ladies wanna go back to my place and conduct a double slit experiment?

Bar Tender Jokes More Bar Tender Jokes

How do you pay a bartender?

With bar tender.

What did the alcoholic Dad, away on business, say to the bartender at the hotel bar?

I'm ready to partiem with my perdiem *sorry, not a dad, and the bar tender didn't laugh either