Why did Julius Caesar buy crayons?

He wanted Mark Antony!

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What did the computer say to the pirate?

Want to date hot Russians!

What is the worst thing you want to hear from a doctor giving you a prostate exam?

Look ma, no hands!

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Where did Capt. Hook buy his prosthesis?

A. At a secondhand store.

Who wants two tickets to the gun show?

I bought the Groupon but can't make it

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How are crayons like people?

The white ones are usually pretty pointless

What is blue, green, red, yellow, purple, orange, black, brown, and gray?

A box of crayons.

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Why did Julius Caesar want to quit politics?

All that backstabbing was too much for him.

What was the most privileged region conquered by Julius Caesar?

Cis-Alpine Gaul.

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Why did Julius Caesar buy crayons?

He wanted Mark Antony!