What does a writer hope to get in a Christmas cracker?

A Pull-it-surprise!

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Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What was wrong with the boy's brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas?

Forty feet of track - all straight!

Why was Santa sacked two days before Christmas?

Elf and safety

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

Why aren't you allowed to smile when taking your driver IDs?

Because you won't be smiling when the cops pull you over.

What did the pirate say after he pulled a steering wheel out of his pants?

It's driving me nuts!

Christmas Cracker Jokes More Christmas Cracker Jokes

What did one eye say to the other eye?

Between you and me, something smells. Credit: Christmas cracker.

What Do You Call A Line Of Men Waiting For A Haircut?

A Barbecue. Christmas crackers are just full of laughs.