What happens to lawyers after they die?

They lie still.

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when Hillary throws relevant questions?

Donald Ducks

What happened when Santa cut his beard?

The police came and took statements but ultimately Mrs. Claus declined to press charges. OC

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

How's your nutrition?

ME: *dipping my burrito into custard* Not going to lie. It's been worse.

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?

A nervous wreck.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Where do you want to be buried?

Me: You mean after I die, right

Why is the story of the Mayan Sacrifice girl so sad?

Because she died a virgin!

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

How many calls do I get?

Cop: one me: What do you think is more likely a lawyer delivering pizza or a dominos providing legal counsel

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Depends on how many cops planted it there