An ironing board.
Something a woman does while a guy is f***ing her.
Because it doesn't rain in the kitchen.
The telephone rang while she was ironing.
It's difficult to open the legs of an ironing board.
A *cow*culater. I made it up myself, so don't groan at the pun.
Sir. Groan worthy penguin jokes(https://allwrong.wordpress.com/2007/10/05/penguin-riddles/)
