What time does Sean Connery get to the US Open?

Ten-ish

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What kind of watch is best for people who don't like time on their hands?

A pocket watch.

Why didn't Jesus ever play in the NHL?

Because every time he tried he got nailed to the boards!

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How does a blonde turn the lights on in the morning?

She opens the car door.

How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator?

Open the door. Put in the elephant. Close the door.

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What did Sean Connery say when he noticed that there wasn't any electricity in the Pennsylvania countryside?

Shomething'sh Amish...

When does Sean Connery usually arrive at Wimbledon?

Tennish.

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What's Serena Williams' favorite time of day?

Ten-ish.

What time does Sean Connery get to the US Open?

Ten-ish