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Ish Jokes

What time does Sean Connery go to Wimbledon?

Ten-ish.

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When is the best time to play racquet sports?

Ten-ish.

What time did Sean Connery arrive at Wimbledon?

Around Ten-ish.

What's Serena Williams' favorite time of day?

Ten-ish.

When does Sean Connery enjoy playing his favorite sport?

Ten-ish.

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What does Colonel Mustard's Mexican maid call him?

Phonetically-ish)* Mis'ser Dijon.

What happens when you mix mustard and ketchup together?

It's must-up..

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What do you call something that's impossible due to physics?

Physics-ly impossible. There's your dad joke for the day.

What did the Middle Eastern dishwasher say when his boss asked him what he did all day at work?

Iraq the dishes in the dish rack and Iran the dishwasher

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How do you describe a Swede, who's not really a Swede?

Swed-ish.

What do you get when hou bring a Greek and a Swede together?

Moose-saka

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What's white & falls from the sky?

The coming of the Lord." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!...please enjoy this tweet. I'm going to hell.

How many didn't?

Ten. (Shame this one doesn't work too well for reddit - the funniest part of this joke is the third punchline enjoying people struggle to understand what the hell you're talking about.)

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How do you describe every gf in one word?

K

How would you describe the average bully?

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How does a lawyer sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other. Credit: Nicholas Sparks from his book 'See Me' which I am reading now.

What do you call a man with no hands and a book?

A read-only man.

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What do you get when you cross an insomniac with an agnostic and a dyslexic?

A person who stays up at night, wondering if there's a dog.

What do you get when you cross an agnostic, an insomniac, and a dyslexic?

Someone who stays up all night wondering if there is a dog.

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Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?

Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.

What time does Sean Connery arrive at Wimbledon?

Tennish