Who is guaranteed to win?

Society.

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Why doesn't Mexico win Olympic Medals?

Because all their best runners, jumpers, and swimmers are in America.

Who won the race?

Society.

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Who is guaranteed to win?

Society.

What's balck on the bottom and white on the top?

Society

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How alcoholic is a drink that's guaranteed to get you drunk?

Fool proof!

What is the 100% guaranteed way to get younger looking skin?

Believe in reincarnation.