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Why did the 280-pound girl marry the 400-pound man?

She wanted a big wedding.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What colour did Matthew McConaughey want his house to be painted?

All white, all white, all white.

Who do fish listen to when they want to hear some dubstep?

Krillex.

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

What candy do you give your wife before you get married?

Pre-nup brittle.

Why did Josh Gordon marry Mary Jane?

So he'd only get a 2 game suspension for abusing her.

400 Pound Jokes More 400 Pound Jokes

Why did the 280-pound girl marry the 400-pound man?

She wanted a big wedding.

Where will the 400 pound gorilla sleep?

Wherever it wants to. R.I.P. Harambe

Big Wedding Jokes More Big Wedding Jokes

Why did the melons plan a big wedding?

Because they cantaloupe!

What kind of melons always have big weddings?

Cantaloupe.