Why did the dog say he was an actor?

His leg was in a cast.

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Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

How do you call a cow with no legs?

You don't, because cows don't have phones.

What do you call a kid with no legs, no arms and an eyepatch?

Names.

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What do you get when you cross a dyslexic agnostic who has insomnia?

A person who stays up all night wondering whether or not there is a dog.

What do you call a dog in a sub?

A subwoofer! Now again: What do you call a dog in a sub? Chinese food!

Cast Jokes More Cast Jokes

How many aspiring actresses does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know - normally they screw in the casting director's hot tub

What's the reason Bollywood Cast parties are awkward?

They think Cast is spelled with an e.

Actor Jokes More Actor Jokes

What do you call a river that's an actor?

Russell Flow

Why did the actor fire his Gorilla agent?

The big Ape kept wanting to take more than a 10% bite!