How do you measure a snake?

In inches. Snakes don't have any feet.

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Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

What did the boots say to the cowboy?

You ride -- I'll go on foot.

Why do giraffes have long necks?

Because their feet stink.

Snake Jokes More Snake Jokes

What kind of snake is good at math?

An adder.

What kind of snake is it good to have on a car?

Windshield vipers.

Measure Jokes More Measure Jokes

How does the devil measure his drugs?

In pentagrams

What is Buddhism measured in?

Oooohms

Inch Jokes More Inch Jokes

What is the difference between "ooooooh"and "aaaaaaah"?

About three inches.

Why did ygritte break up with Jon Snow?

She didn't want six inches of snow all year long.