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Why don't Jedi mathematicians use the absolute value function?

Because only a Sith deals in absolutes.

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What did the feminist Jedi say to Emperor Palpatine?

Check your privilege, sithlord

Why are Jedi terrible at Rugby?

Because "There is no Try."

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What did Obe Wan say to Skywalker when he was teaching him table manners?

Use the forks Luke.

How can you tell that the movie Martian is not realistic?

Because Americans use imperial unit system.

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Why are Jedis allowed to use negative numbers?

Because only Siths deal in absolutes.

What do short people call something that's too high up?

Absolute zero, because it's impossible to reach

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Why was there a dyslexic stormtrooper?

Sith happens.

Where does the Emperor keep all his past dead Sith's gear for display?

The Sithsonian.

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Why don't Jedi Knights use the Kelvin scale?

Only a Sith deals in absolutes.

Why don't the jedi drink vodka?

Because only the Sith deal in absolut