Why don't you chat with us in the kitchenette in the morning?

Me: Because I'm not paid to be your friend & you say kitchenette.

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Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?

I wouldn't pay 50 to have a lentil on my face...

What's your five-year goal?

Me: Paid administrative leave.

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

What do you call a piece of pasta that doesn't have any friends?

Cannelonely!

What do you like to do in your free time?

Guy: I spy on people. Girl: Really I like to take long walks in the park and go to the movies with my friends. Guy: I know.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

I dropped a pear in my car this morning.

You should drop another one, then you would have a pair.

What's one thing a man doesn't want to hear the morning after?

Yes, I'm completely sure.