How can you tell a dog from an elephant?

The elephant remembers.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

Why does the dog go to the gym?

He wants to get ruff

When Pavlov was done with his experiments what did he do with his dogs?

Donate them to the salivation army I'llseemyselfout

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the calculus teacher tell the crew of his submarine while they were diving?

Derive, derive, derive!

How can you tell that a politician lies?

His lips are moving

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

What's as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

An elephant's shadow!

What did the elephant say when it saw the Chihuahuas coming down the road?

Look out for the mice!

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

When my laptop asks "Are you sure?

It's because it still remembers all of the other bad decisions I have made.

What is the best gift you can give your girlfriend for your anniversary?

Nothing. It's a gift she will always remember. Edit: Wording clarified (Thanks to therinnovator).