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What do aliens use to buy their coffee?

Starbucks

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Where do bourgeois monarchists get their coffee?

Tsarbucks

What crime was committed against the coffee?

He was mugged.

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What do pirates use to copy files?

Yarrrrrsync!

What does cats and festival attendees have in common?

They both love using the toilet right after it's been cleaned.

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Why buy an invisible knife?

I don't see the point

What happens when the President dies?

The Vice President takes over. What happens when the Vice President dies? The Speaker of the House takes over. What happens when the Speaker of the House dies? You go to Radio Shack and buy a new speaker.

Starbuck Jokes More Starbuck Jokes

What did the Minotaur order at Starbucks?

Half calf

What do aliens use to buy their coffee?

Starbucks