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How do these presidential candidates sleep at night?

With an electorate blanket.

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Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

Why did the man sleep after being run over by a car?

Because he got tired.

Where do books sleep?

Under their covers.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

Why did the cellphone go to court?

Because it was charged with battery.

What is 20 inches long and makes women scream at night?

A stillborn

Presidential Candidate Jokes More Presidential Candidate Jokes

How do you know a presidential candidate is lying?

Their lips are moving.

Why did the Mayor take so long to endorse a Presidential candidate?

Because he was running on CP time.