How do you keep your Thanksgiving guests from falling asleep on your couch?

Infuse the gravy with cocaine.

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Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What do you call a kid who falls into a gorilla enclosure?

Zoolander

What's the difference between a bindle of cocaine and a baby?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let one fall out the window

Couch Jokes More Couch Jokes

Why did the couch give the table a dollar?

Because it was for chair-ity

How do you keep your Thanksgiving guests from falling asleep on your couch?

Infuse the gravy with cocaine.

Thanksgiving Jokes More Thanksgiving Jokes

What will Putin be having for Thanksgiving dinner?

Turkey.

How do you say Thanksgiving in Native American?

Last Supper

Cocaine Jokes More Cocaine Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a kilo of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a kilo of cocaine fall out of a window.

What do you get when you mix a boxer and cocaine?

A punchline

Gravy Jokes More Gravy Jokes

What are you wearing?

ME: *nodding and sniffing myself* Mashed potatoes with gravy.

What did the mother turkey say to her naughty son Tom?

If your dad knew how you were acting he'd roll over in his gravy