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How do you save a suicidal procrastinator?

Tell them it can probably wait 'til tomorrow.

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What did 'b' say to his friend 'e' after 'e' saved his life?

AY E! I O U edit: added Y

Why Did Superman Save a Burning Chemistry Lab?

He was trying to save Krypton

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How do you describe people who tell "I see dead people" jokes?

They have a sixth sense of humor

How can you tell if a mechanic went home for lunch?

One of his fingers is clean

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What do you call a banana you want tomorrow in Spanish?

Baana

How do you save a suicidal procrastinator?

Tell them it can probably wait 'til tomorrow.

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What if I draw a peanut on her napkin?

Wife: Please go wait in the car

How do you get a Ford recalled?

Wait.