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How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold it in place, another to rotate the universe around it.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many men does it take to change a lightbulb?

Not all men.

How many cuckolds does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. Somebody else does the screwing for 'em.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many hamsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two.

What do blondes and turtles have in common?

When they're on their backs, they're screwed.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

How many feminists do you need to replace a lightbulb?

Only 1, she'll hold the bulb in place and wait while the world revolves around her.

What did the man say while holding a square clock?

I'm holding Time Square!

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

Why was christopher never in the same place?

Because he's always Walken

What do you call a place where they don't allow sleeveless shirts?

A gun free zone

Universe Jokes More Universe Jokes

What is the chance we are alone in the universe?

Professor: Astronomical.

Why did Steve Harvey announce Miss Colombia as the Miss Universe winner?

Because he couldn't pronounce Miss Philippines.

Rotate Jokes More Rotate Jokes

What if earth rotates 30 times faster?

Interviewer:"If the Earth rotates 30 times faster, what will happen?" engineer:"We will get our salary everyday" :D Think Greedily Act Confidently

What did the mathematician say about vertical videos?

I'm sorry, but the video you filmed is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again.

Theoretical Physicist Jokes More Theoretical Physicist Jokes

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold it in place, another to rotate the universe around it.

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to hold the bulb and one to rotate the universe.