How many times we need to tell you that she died?

Man: It pleases me to listen that she died.

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?

One you'll see in a while, the other you'll see later.

Why cant programmers tell the difference between Christmas and Thanksgiving?

Because oct 31 = dec 25

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Why do Europeans hate American food?

Europeans don't want to die yet. Unlike Americans who don't wanna diet.

What would you do if I died?

Husband: I would go crazy Wife: Would you re-marry Husband: Ah, not that crazy..

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Why do you need to take notes during jokes?

Joke was supposed to be this: Why do you need to take notes during church? because the peoples of noah's day, "took no note".

What did the cook say to the dough?

I "NEED" you!

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Why don't North Koreans listen to funk?

Cos they've got no Seoul! Thank you very much.

How do you get your wife to listen to every word without interrupting?

Talk in your sleep.