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Why do you look out the window in the morning?

Because you can't see through walls, and you can't see anything at night anyway.

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What looks like red paint but is dry?

Dried red paint

How can you tell if an engineer is an extrovert?

They look at YOUR shoes when they talk to you.

Wall Jokes More Wall Jokes

Where are you going?

Me: Out. I can't stand being hemmed in by four walls. Wife: How many walls has the pub got Five

Why can't mimes finish marathons?

Because they can't get past "the wall".

Window Jokes More Window Jokes

Why did Apple employee get away jacking off in the office?

Because there are no windows!

Why is the new version called Windows 10?

Because 7 ate 9.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What would be different if men got pregnant?

Maternity leave would last for two years with full pay and morning sickness would rank as the nation's #1 health problem.

Why are cats longer in the evening than they are in the morning?

Because they're let out in the evening and taking in in the morning!

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What does an insomniac, agnostic, dyslexic spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

What do you get when you cross a philosopher, an insomniac and a dyslexic?

A guy who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog. Infinite Jest, by DFW