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How many trains have you derailed to date?

I replied "It's hard to keep track."

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Date Jokes More Date Jokes

What is the difference between a single 40-year-old woman and a single 40-year-old man?

The 40-year-old woman thinks often of having children and the man thinks often about dating them.

When I was young, I wanted to date a doctor for money. How superficial was that?

Now it would be for the prescriptions.

Train Jokes More Train Jokes

How many trains have I derailed in all my years as a train driver?

It's hard to keep track.

What do good dragons read when they are pregnant?

How to Train Your Dragon. Good parenting, that is.

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

What would be your reply?

Someone stops you in the middle of the road and asks you to tell him a good joke, What would be your reply?

What do you mean he's your half son?

What do you mean what do I mean?" replied the man. He went on to explain "My son has half my genes, that makes him my half-son." The woman he was talking to decided he was crazy and without replying walked past him. She looked back and noticed his neck was red, after all it was a sunny day.

Track Jokes More Track Jokes

Why couldn't the taxidermist finish anything he started?

Because he kept getting side tracked by pet projects

Who has time to monitor followers/unfollowers?

I can barely keep track of my kids and I only have 1 of those. Wait. Two. I have 2 kids.

Derail Jokes More Derail Jokes

How many have you derailed this year?

I replied, "I'm not sure, it's hard to keep track"

Why did the train sound effect album get derailed?

The tracks were unfinished.