What did earth say to the other planet?

You guys have no life!

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Life Jokes More Life Jokes

How's my life?

Let's just say I'm starting a lot of sentences with "let's just say".

Who's Angry in Japan?

The director of Life of Pi.

Earth Jokes More Earth Jokes

What on Earth happened?

The doctor said, surprised. "I don't know, it started with a boil on my arse." the frog said.

What did the aliens say, when they came to earth in search of soda pop?

Take me to your liter!

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

How many guys in the friend zone does it take to light a light bulb?

None, they just stand around complimenting it, and get mad when it won't screw.

Why does noone listen ever to the guy who talks with his mouth full?

He is so misunderstood.

Planet Jokes More Planet Jokes

What's it called when a planet orbits its sun 8 times?

An orbyte

Why is milk the fastest liquid on the planet?

It's pasteurised before you can see it!