What did God say to Jesus?

This lawn ain't gonna mow itself.

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Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What did God say to Jesus?

This lawn ain't gonna mow itself.

What gun does Jesus hate the most?

The nail gun. So sorry if this offends you Credit to the podcast

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What traumatic event lead to you not believing in god?

Me: oh, um, science.

Why did God invent economists?

So accountants could have someone to laugh at.

Lawn Jokes More Lawn Jokes

What do you do when you see a half dead native man crawling across your lawn?

Stop laughing and reload

Why did the man put a dead tiger on his lawn?

To scare off Cat burglars!

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What did the computer do with his overgrown gardens...?

Mowed 'em.

How many of my parents does it take to mow the lawn?

None. They pay me to do it.