What did the man who ate a clock say?

That was time consuming but I still want seconds.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What did the baby skunk want to be when he grew up?

A big stinker!

What is an Iraqi children on a playground doing?

He's distracting the sniper. Didn't want to offend.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Who is your favorite X-Man?

Mine is Bruce Jenner

What do you call a man who's always in high spirits?

An alcoholic.

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What's a cat's second favorite food?

Spa-catti!

How many seconds are there in one year?

12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd.

Eat Jokes More Eat Jokes

Why was Jeffrey Dahmer so healthy?

Because he ate five fruits a day!

Why is the new OS from Microsoft called Windows 10?

Because 7 ate 9.

Consume Jokes More Consume Jokes

What's the longest time in which you haven't consumed alcohol?

My record is 21 years.

Why do whales have really good immune systems?

They consume a lot of vitamin SEA!

Clock Jokes More Clock Jokes

Why don't Applebee's employees wear watches?

Cuz there's a clock on the microwave

Why shouldn't you have coffee while on the clock?

Because that would be "grounds" for termination!