What did the calculus teacher tell the crew of his submarine while they were diving?

Derive, derive, derive!

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

I'll tell you tomorrow.

How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce unionized.

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Why do they never serve a beer at math party?

Because you can't drink and derive

Why dont Calculus majors throw house parties?

Because you should never drink and derive.

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Why did the Naval Inspector fail the submarine?

Because he found it to be SUB-standard.

What did the calculus teacher tell the crew of his submarine while they were diving?

Derive, derive, derive!

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Why the F1 driver doesn't get along with his crew?

He has thrust issues.

What's the difference between the space shuttle and a 2.5 kiloton bomb?

The crew.

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What did the calculus teacher tell the crew of his submarine while they were diving?

Derive, derive, derive!

What does a calculus teacher say when a student doesn't get it?

Bro, do you even function?