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What did you hear about the man who fell into the upholstery machine...?

I heard that he was fully re-covered.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What did the man say after he forgot to pull out?

I regret nutting!!!

What do you call a man with a kilt over his head?

Scott!

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What do you call the action where a dead guy falls out of a car and you have to put him back in?

A rehearsal

Why did the nuke switch course?

Because a girl on the ground said "I have a boyfriend" later that day the nuke fell into depression

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

Why did the hotel refuse hospitality to the Navy?

They didn't want their rooms covered with seamen.

How much for the mirror?

Ma'am that's the cover of Vogue

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Where'd you get them?

Him: ... *peeks under bathroom stall* Did you hear me

What attracted you to our company?

Well, I heard you pay money in exchange for work