What do you call a man who loses pounds for a living?

A bad gambler

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What do you call Michael Buble's long lost evil twin brother?

Pu-pu puble

Why did Mr. T reject Marxism?

Because Marx said "You have nothing to lose but your chains."

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why did Captain Kirk go into the ladies toilet?

To boldly go where no man has been before!

What do you call a man holding a machine gun?

Sir

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What kind of house does Chuck Norris live in?

A roundhouse.

What do you call a Sith Lord who lives in the woods?

Darth Deciduous

Pound Jokes More Pound Jokes

Why are there so many dogs at the pound?

Because no one wants them.

What's the difference between a wife and a mistress?

About fifty pounds.