What do you do with the time saved?

Me: *tying my dogs shoes* Sorry, what

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Why do gangsters save so much money on clothes?

Cause all their pants are half-off

What's the only thing that could have saved George Michael?

A whambulance

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What would happen if all Chinese people jumped off a chair, all at the same time?

I don't know either, but you would need a reeeally big chair!

How does a cat tell time??

In meowers

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What is the result?

A tie.

What did Katy Perry steal from Dr. Frankenstein's closet?

The Tie of the Igor.