What do you get when you add 2 apples to 3 apples?

A senior high school math problem.

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What's 1+1?

2

What do you get if 2 black men sleep in a sleeping bag?

A twix bar

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Why is Irish bean soup made with 239 beans?

Because if you add even one more it gets "2 farty".

What happened when Apple added the new touchbar?

They're taking away functions, and there's no escape.

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What's the best part about being a meth addict?

3 sleeps 'til Christmas

Why wasn't Jesus born in Washington DC?

They couldn't find 3 wise men or a virgin