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What do you get when you add 2 apples to 3 apples?

A senior high school math problem.

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What did Noah tell his son while they were fishing?

Better get this right, I only have 2 worms.

What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes?

Nothing, you've already told her twice.

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Why did the chef add extra oregano to the sauce?

He was making up for lost thyme. Thank you, thank you. I'll just show myself out now.

What do you call a Children's show with some Alcohol added in?

Booze Clues.

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Where can you buy a 3 headed flying purple camel with 74 noses?

Ebay.

When would a discount be a bad thing?

Have 3 abortions and get the fourth free.