What happens when Vladimir Putin stands up too fast?

Head Russian...

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Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

How Many Russians Does It Take To Invade Crimea?

None according to the Russians.

Where do the Russian separatists go to complain about their lives?

Crimea River

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when everyone in the country takes a pee at the same time?

Urine-nation!

What happened to the clock that was still hungry?

It went back 4 seconds.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What's the only thing politicians stand for?

Reelection.

What's the difference between a political speech and a stand-up comic show?

They both tell the audience what they are glad to hear. But at the end, the audience laughs at the comic, and the politician laughs at the audience.

Vladimir Putin Jokes More Vladimir Putin Jokes

What do you call Vladimir Putin after an ultimate fighting championship?

Vloody Putin

What is Vladimir Putin's favourite Justin Timberlake song?

Crimea river