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What has hands but can't clap?

Stephen Hawking

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why did the drill sergeant get a dishonorable discharge?

He couldn't keep his hands off his privates

What has 5 fingers but isn't your hand?

My hand.

Stephen Hawk Jokes More Stephen Hawk Jokes

What's black and is on top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking after a housefire.

What does Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashes?

Nothing.

Hawk Jokes More Hawk Jokes

Who has the fastest brain in the world?

Steven Hawking with a brake failure!

Why is Stephen Hawking so controversial?

He never changes his position.

Clap Jokes More Clap Jokes

What has hands but can't clap?

Stephen Hawking

Why can't T-Rexs clap their hands?

Because they're all dead