Hawk Jokes

Why is Stephen Hawking successful?

He can't run away from his responsibilities.

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What's black and sits on top of a staircase?

Stephen Hawking in a house fire.

What vegetable is a bug most afraid of?

Stephen Hawking

Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs?

Stpehen hawking after a house fire.

What do scientists and vegetables have in common?

Stephen Hawking

What will ESPN talk about if both the Hawks and Rockets make it to the NBA final?

The NHL playoffs

What's the best vegetable to bring to a party?

Stephen Hawking

Why is Stephen Hawking so controversial?

He never changes his position.

What has a tongue, cannot walk, but gets around a lot?

Steven Hawking

Where are you?

I said to watch him like a hawk! ME: soaring 20m above w/ a beakful of mice I AM

What if Stephen Hawking was the real slim shady?

But we would never know because he couldn't stand up

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What's black and found at the top of a stair case?

Stephen Hawking after a house fire.

What's burnt to a crisp and at the top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking after a house fire.

What did the Australian say to the hawk?

Good eye!

What has hands but can't clap?

Stephen Hawking

What's black and is on top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking after a housefire.

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E Jokes More E Jokes

What's the reason Bollywood Cast parties are awkward?

They think Cast is spelled with an e.

What has one "n", two "g"s, an "i", "e", and an "r" and you can only say this word when you belong to this group?

Ginger

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?

They both know when you are sleeping.

What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas?

I dont know, hes still trying to kick it open.

Repair Jokes More Repair Jokes

What material does Cayde-6 use to repair his armor after falling feet first into hell?

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What song did Scar sing when he fixed his car horn?

Beep repaired...

Tiger Woods Jokes More Tiger Woods Jokes

Why does Tiger Woods make the best milkshakes?

He uses the best ingredients.

How do you know Tiger Woods is one of the richest people in the world?

He plays golf.

Animal Jokes More Animal Jokes

What is something that mother giraffes have but no other animal has?

Baby giraffes.

What kind of animal can record video?

A cam-el. Get it, because a camera records things and a camel is a animal.

Hide Jokes More Hide Jokes

How does a tauren hide in a cherry tree?

He paints his hooves red.

Why did the elephant paint himself with different colours?

Because he wanted to hide in the colouring box!

Mineral Jokes More Mineral Jokes

Why did Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson have to change his diet?

Because his nutritionist said he had too many minerals in his system!

How many rocks did Hank Schrader have in his collection by the end of Breaking Bad?

None, they were all minerals.

Rosie O'donnell Jokes More Rosie O'donnell Jokes

How do you get Amy Schumer, Rosie O'donnell and Lena Dunham to move to Canada?

Piece of cake.