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What's the best vegetable to bring to a party?

Stephen Hawking

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Party Jokes More Party Jokes

What kinda vegetables like to party?

Lettuce turnip da beet!

How do you throw a party in Nigeria?

You stick a piece of bread to the ceiling

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

What is the difference between a Mother and Wife?

One woman brings you into this world crying and the other ensures you continue to do so.

What's all this?

Bracken: Well you told me to bring all my records with me and I did. Here's some by Willie Nelson Tammy Wynette and Garth Brooks...

Stephen Hawk Jokes More Stephen Hawk Jokes

Why doesn't Stephen Hawking need a wife?

Because he has his own shoulder to cry on. Edit: all credit goes to /u/Earleebird who posted it in a comment in /r/oldschoolcool

Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs after a house fire?

Stephen Hawking's

Hawk Jokes More Hawk Jokes

Who has the fastest brain in the world?

Steven Hawking with a brake failure!

Where are you?

I said to watch him like a hawk! ME: soaring 20m above w/ a beakful of mice I AM

Good Vegetable Jokes More Good Vegetable Jokes

What's the best vegetable to bring to a party?

Stephen Hawking

What's the best vegetable for stepping on when you get out of the shower?

A toe-mat-o.