Smashed potatoes.
I told her that drinks were on the house
The close thing I came to having friends with benefits was.......... convincing my friend to bring food for me daily.
Her algae bra.
Because they always bring boos.
None, the beer should be open by the time she has brought it to you.
To bring down the Wicked Witch of the West.
Because it's soda pressing
Pilgrims.
Because they cantaloupe. This joke was brought to you by Dads inc.
Squirrels they're the best at getting nuts out of their shells.
You must not bring either to the movies.
Poverty
He's a party pooper!
His homemade Bris-kit.
For bringing home the bacon.
He got lost in the maize.
Because they can get 4g
The referee said he wanted a clean fight.
He was trying to get her pedicure.
Because he's the fire starter.
Fo Drizzle.
Its in case he gets a hole-in-one.
Just in case they get a hole in one. Credit to
He was expecting showers.
Slanta Claus.
An AYE-Phone. (Joke brought to you by a 5 year old)
The one who can bring his friends two cups of coffee and a dozen donuts.
In case he got a hole in one.
They might Pikachu.
Gravity. It's always bringing me down.
At the bottom of the fifth the bags were loaded.
Eggsalad
They only had 2 vans
Moose-saka
In case he gets a hole-in-one
Because its a band substance
One woman brings you into this world crying and the other ensures you continue to do so.
A pocket full of shells.
It was leave your keys at the door.
He brought the wrong carrion.
The Frankenstork.
Because when he asked his wife how many eggs to buy, she said 4!
Wooffies!
Instead of all this "how did you get in to my house " calling 9-11 business.
He wanted a spare in case he had a split.
Bring it to a bool.
She's afraid they'll bring down the house.
So that they can pack the defence!
In case you get a hole-in-one (stolen from some girl at school)
Bring two Mormons.
Because he brought his own drumsticks
Your calves.
A scale letrix!
Bring her flours
The police made him bring it back again.
Row v. Wade
In case he gets a hole in one.
Because April showers, bring May flowers!
Because it brings Mayflowers.
Bring on their subs!
Toad was a fungi.
Swallow the leader. *This joke has been brought to you by my 8 year old's math homework.*
He wanted to sing higher!
Long pause while Jesus glares at interviewer* Are you being serious right now
Congee-gal visit
He wanted to have some stage presents.
None, it should be open when she brings it to you.
A turn up
A cup of yogurt.
Ten. One to actually change the lightbulb and nine to bring refreshments
A dog that will run to the shop to get your paper and bring back last weeks paper!
A ladder.
A navi-gator!
For the drizzle
Because he always brings the boos
In case you get a hole in one.
Because if you only bring one, he'll drink all your beer.
Because they cantaloupe...
Santa Clues.
Carrion luggage
So they can bring two canopies.
A hundred but they'll all be competing to be the one to change the bulb and bring light to the world.
So he could bring his 'sub' on
In case he got a hole-in-one.
It's because he heard hospital beds have a high mortality rate.
His doughter.
He used a Luigi Board.
The Swallow.
I can't help it - she brings out the beast in me!
He brought it to school and said 'An Ape-lle for the teacher!'
A coathanger.
A swallow.
Because droids can't get service.
A Christmas tree. Because they're lit.
What do you mean you only brought two ants!
Me: I just ran out of the fancy shampoo my previous GF bought for me.
Chopin
WRAP MUSIC!
So she could say Hello from the outside.
A Werehouse.
He experiences culture shock.
Nevermind they'll just tell you anyway
He/she's not sitting or standing!
I came, I upvoted, I reposted.
The coming of the Lord.
Lettuce turnip da beet!
They turnip the beets!
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
Daesh Network
1. Minimum wage 2. Police reform 3. Why are there raisins in this, Louise
Because they don't like Turkey
