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Why did the man bring his bed with him to the hospital?

It's because he heard hospital beds have a high mortality rate.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why did the boy take a ruler to bed with him?

To see how long he slept.

Why did the spy stay in bed?

To stay under cover

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do canes and blue pills have in common?

They're both ready for use when a man is limp.

What do you call a man with a toe on his knee?

Tony

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

What's a mortician's least favorite day on the job?

Bring Your Kid to Work Day

Why did the boxer bring a bar of soap into the ring?

The referee said he wanted a clean fight.

Hospital Jokes More Hospital Jokes

What take out food should you avoid at all costs in Hospital?

Donor Kebab

Why'd the cookie go to the hospital?

It was feeling a little crumby.

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What did you hear about the tree who was in love?

He pined everyday.

Why does everyone keep saying the Boston Marathon was a tragedy?

I heard everybody had a blast.