Why did the man use a pair of scissors on the rope?

The knife just wasn't cutting it.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Slow down, and possibly use a lubricant

What satellite TV provider does ISIS use?

Daesh Network

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you call a super kind man who spends too much time on the beach?

A tangent

What do you call a bakery staffed entirely by men?

A pastryarchy.

Knife Jokes More Knife Jokes

What do you call a salad that's been cut with a knife?

Ceasar

What did the knife say to the pretty lady?

Nothing, she knew what was coming...

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

How do you cut the sea in half?

With a seesaw

What's the difference between an accordion and an onion?

No one cries when you cut up an accordion

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

Why are they called Tuna Fish?

Because they don't swim in pairs. Are there two of those fish? Nahhh.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Incase he got a hole in one. HEHE one of my favs. Whats your fav joke?

Rope Jokes More Rope Jokes

Which wrestler do the Gorillas admire most?

Gorilla Monsoon - he knows the ropes!

What did the string say when the rope proposed marriage?

Let's knot.

Scissor Jokes More Scissor Jokes

When a cop pulls you over and asks, "Papers?

Answer "Scissors." then drive away..

What did the lesbian pirate say to her peg legged girlfriend?

Scissor me timbers