Why did the man use a pair of scissors on the rope?

The knife just wasn't cutting it.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why isn't a dime worth as much today as it used to be?

Because the dimes (times) have changed.

Which hand would you use to pick up a dangerous snake?

Someone else's!

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist's window?

Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.

What do you call a man who sells clockwork toys?

A Wind-up Merchant.

Knife Jokes More Knife Jokes

Why do you carry a knife?

Me: A sword is harder to hide.

What does stormtrooper armor protect against, exactly?

Knives

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

Why should you never let a non-metal drive a train?

Because they're poor conductors! (I know they're called Engineers but cut me some slack, I thought of this in the 9th grade.)

What is the difference between a boat and a woman?

The boat cuts through the water, a woman waters through the cut.

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

Why did the bowler bring two pairs of pants?

He wanted a spare in case he had a split.

I dropped a pear in my car this morning.

You should drop another one, then you would have a pair.

Rope Jokes More Rope Jokes

What falls down faster from a tree, a leaf or an emo?

A leaf. The rope catches the emo.

Why didn't the rope get any presents this year?

He was very knotty.

Scissor Jokes More Scissor Jokes

What do you call an innovation in scissors?

Cutting-edge technology

When a cop pulls you over and asks, "Papers?

Answer "Scissors." then drive away..