Daily Jokes

What's you experience with "Friends with benefits"?

The close thing I came to having friends with benefits was.......... convincing my friend to bring food for me daily.

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Love

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What do cannibal say when they say grace?

We thank you Lord for our daily dead!

How did Eddard Stark get his daily recommended amount of fiber?

Raisin' Bran.

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Convince Jokes More Convince Jokes

What's the hardest thing about being an audiophile?

Convincing the sound to get into your van.

How do you convince your neighbor to share their water with you?

Try to get a long well.

Recommend Jokes More Recommend Jokes

What haircut did the Texan barber recommend when asked?

He couldn't think of anything, and said "I'll mullet over"

How did Eddard Stark get his daily recommended amount of fiber?

Raisin' Bran.

Journalist Jokes More Journalist Jokes

What keyboard shortcut is extensively used by journalists who work for Breitbart News?

Alt right

What do you call a journalist in Russia?

An ambulance.

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

Why did the strawberry cry?

Because his mother was in a jam.

Why did the mother bear ask the baby bear to wear shoes before he ran through the forest?

Because he was barefooted!!!

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

What is a nurse in the maternity ward's favorite kind of food?

Delivery.

What food can tell you if a girl is pregnant?

Chickpea

Grace Jokes More Grace Jokes

What's "saying grace?

Me: It's when we thank the one who provided our food. 4-year-old: We thank the microwave

Why don't we say Grace?

Me: I don't know. 5-year-old: Me: 5-year-old: Is it because your cooking makes God angry

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

How will you be paying, sir?

Check mate"..

How many Swiss does it take to change a light bulb?

None. We pay a German to do it.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Why do they print nutritional information on Snickers bars?

If you don't know candy is bad for you, what are the chances you can read

What newspaper do cows read?

The Daily Moos.