The close thing I came to having friends with benefits was.......... convincing my friend to bring food for me daily.
We thank you Lord for our daily dead!
Raisin' Bran.
They're more of a kids meal.
The Daily Express.
Let us prey.
Pupperware
A buck an ear
He kept looking at his hoes.
Not just the hard on............ it would've made him more flexible
The police made him bring it back again.
Because it has NO FANS!!! (get it no fans... thank you!! don't forget to tip your server.)
A sub-woofer! Thank you, I'll be here all day.
Me: Daily Dentist: *Pulls fully grown centaur from between my 2nd and 3rd molars*
Me: "BRO, you were there."
Because she's always drinking from the coup de Grace. (This was my sister's favourite joke when we were kids. Once our mum flipped out on a long car journey because she told it too many times).
Me: It's when we thank the one who provided our food. 4-year-old: We thank the microwave
Try to get a long well.
