Convince Jokes

What's you experience with "Friends with benefits"?

The close thing I came to having friends with benefits was.......... convincing my friend to bring food for me daily.

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What did Ernie say when his friend tried to convince him he was ice cream?

Are you surebert?

What's the hardest thing about being an audiophile?

Convincing the sound to get into your van.

Why is it really hard to convince Egyptians?

Because they all live in de-Nile...

How do you convince your neighbor to share their water with you?

Try to get a long well.

How do you convince America to join a war?

Tell them its almost over

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Invent Jokes More Invent Jokes

How did they invent break dancing?

Trying to steal the hubcaps off a moving car.

Why is there so little Black literature?

Because spray paint wasn't invented until 1949.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What are your thoughts on it?

ME: trying to impress her I have 6 wives

How many tries did it take to find out if Lance Armstrong was ticklish?

One testtickle

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why do you wanna work at Clickbait Enterprises?

Here's 10 reasons why I should get the job "ok" Number 7 will shock you "You're hired"

What did the windmill say to the windmill engineer?

I'm a big fan of your work

Water Jokes More Water Jokes

What's the difference between a special needs worker and a gardener?

One of them has to water their vegetables

Why did the vegetables hop into the boiling pot of water?

They were part of a stewicide pact.

Experience Jokes More Experience Jokes

What do you call the underwear of someone experiencing nocturnal emissions?

Dreamcatchers

Why do volleyball player want to join the armed forces?

For the chance to gain some experience in the service.

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

What film do you get when you pull your pants down?

Free Willy

What did the policeman say when he pulled over a nissan?

Nissan Haltima Bonus: What do you call it when a kia pulls up to a red light Kia stoptima

De Jokes More De Jokes

Why did the man drowning in the river think he wasn't going to die?

He was in de-Nile.

What do you call a veal-birthing cow?

De-calf

Abortion Jokes More Abortion Jokes

What is the most effective form of birth control?

Abortions.

Why does Bernie Sanders support abortions?

Because even after he's blown his load he won't pull out.