When I bring you breakfast in bed, why can't you just say "thank you"?

Instead of all this "how did you get in to my house " calling 9-11 business.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

How do you know when you are in bed with a witch?

She has a big "W" embroidered on her pyjamas!

Why did the boy take the ruler to bed?

He wanted to see how long he slept.

Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

What do you call a dog that is underwater?

A sub-woofer! Thank you, I'll be here all day.

Where did I get my scarf?

It's a CVS receipt. You love it Oh thank you very much.

House Jokes More House Jokes

How did the blind man know Santa was in his house?

He felt his presents.

What do you call an incredibly well-dressed punk?

The Speaker of the House

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

What's common between a crying baby and a gun?

You must not bring either to the movies.

What kind of bird brings no babies?

A swallow.

9 Jokes More 9 Jokes

Why was 9 mad at 0 after winning a game of bingo?

Because 0 1 2

Why is 6 afraid of 9 on New Years Eve?

Because 9, 8, 7....

Breakfast Jokes More Breakfast Jokes

What do sick cannibals have for breakfast?

Vitamin bills!

What does a duck like to have for breakfast?

Quacker Oats