How did the blind man know Santa was in his house?

He felt his presents.

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Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

Why don't you see Santa for the rest of the year?

Because for the rest of the year he's in prison for breaking into people's houses.

What do you call a kid who doesn't believe in Santa?

A rebel without a Claus.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why isn't Barney the Dinosaur allowed to drive?

Because everybody knows -- tyrannosaurus wrecks.

What did one of Frankenstein's ears say to the other?

I didn't know we lived on the same block.

Present Jokes More Present Jokes

What did the guy without hands get for Christmas?

We don't know, he hasn't opened the present yet

Why did the rope not get any presents?

Because he was knotty.

House Jokes More House Jokes

Why did the blonde climb up to the roof of the bar?

She heard that the drinks were on the house.

Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his house?

Because he was Snowden

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What did the salad wearing a tuxedo say?

I feel a bit overdressed.

How does a tail pipe feel after a long car ride?

Exhausted.

Blind Man Jokes More Blind Man Jokes

What did the blind man say when he walked into the fish market?

Good morniiiiiiing ladies!

What did the blind man say when he walked past the fish market?

Is this a tumblr meetup?