Blind Man Jokes

How do you spot the blind man at a nudist beach?

Well..it's not hard

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What is the worst thing anyone can do to a blind man?

Leave a plunger in the toilet!

What's a blind mans worst fear?

A prius

What did the blind man say when he walked past the fish market?

Is this a tumblr meetup?

What has one eye but can't see?

A blind man...

Why did the blind man use chopsticks?

Because he couldn't see the point in forks.

How did the blind man know Santa was in his house?

He felt his presents.

What did the blind man say when he walked into the fish market?

Good morniiiiiiing ladies!

How do you surprise a blind man?

Stick a plunger in the toilet

What did the blind man say when he walked past the fish store?

Hello, ladies

What did the blind man say when he sipped a frozen drink and was cured?

Icee.

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Why did the blind man cross the road?

Cuz he couldn't see it (Probly already posted but I've never seen it on r/jokes before)

How did a blind man drive his car?

One hand on the wheel the other on the road.

What did Jesus say after he healed the blind man?

Made you look!

What's the worst thing you can do to a blind man?

Leave the plunger in the toilet

What did the blind man say to his old friend?

Ayy, long time no see!

What is the difference between a blind man and a sailor in prison?

One can't see to go the other can't go to sea.

What did the blind man say to his estranged friend?

Long time, no see.

What did the blind man say to the blind man?

Long time no see.

What did the blind man say when he arrived at the fish market?

Hello, ladies.

What is the worse thing you can do to a blind man?

Leave the plunger in the toilet!

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What's a blind man doing on a boat?

Waiting for a bus.

What would the blind man say every morning when he walked past the fish market?

Good morning, ladies!

How many blind men would it take to change a light bulb?

Why would a blind man need a light bulb?

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Nudist Camp Jokes More Nudist Camp Jokes

Who's the most popular guy in the nudist camp?

The one who can carry two cups of coffee AND a dozen donurs!

How do you find a blind man in a nudist camp?

It's not hard.

Fish Market Jokes More Fish Market Jokes

What does the blind say when he walks past the fish market?

Hello ladies.

What did the blindman say when he walked by the fish market?

Helllllllloooooo (insert your mother's/wife's/sister's/grandmother's name here.)

Spot Jokes More Spot Jokes

Why do tigers have stripes?

They don't want to be spotted.

What's got two legs, spots and bleeds?

Half a cheetah.

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

Why does the Spanish dude keep walking left?

Because izquierda going right.

Why do birds fly to the tropics in winter?

Why, wouldn't the winter be over by the time they reach, if they walk all the way along? So they fly.

Chopstick Jokes More Chopstick Jokes

What is another name for a knife?

A chopstick!

Why did the blind man use chopsticks?

Because he couldn't see the point in forks.

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

What happens if Ramsay Bolton met Samwell Tarly's girlfriend?

Gilly suit

Where does geography and geography meet?

The Bermuda Triangle.

Point Jokes More Point Jokes

Why did Wile E. Coyote have a "Detour" sign pointing to the edge of a cliff?

To throw the Roadrunner off.

How many redditors does it take to point out a repost?

All of them.

Fuck Jokes More Fuck Jokes

How many blind men would it take to change a light bulb?

Why would a blind man need a light bulb?

How many ants does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Only two, but you've got to wonder how they climbed up there!