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What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas?

I dont know, hes still trying to kick it open.

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's trying to get home?

A taxi

What do you call a beautiful woman on the arm of a banjo player?

A tattoo.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why do barbers make good drivers?

Because they know all the short cuts.

What do children think of the world?

I don't know, this is the first time I've logged onto Reddit, today.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Why did the kid run across the freeway?

To show his friends he had guts. And boy, did he have guts.

How do Ethiopians celebrate their kids first birthday?

By putting flowers on the grave.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What does a fresh egg say when you try to hardboil it?

It'll take me about 20 minutes to get hard, I just got laid by some chick.

Why don't men want to go down on a woman first thing in the morning?

Have you ever tried to peel apart a grilled cheese?

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve!

What do you get when you cross an apple with a Christmas tree?

A pear. P.s. got this joke in a cracker. If anybody gets it can you please explain it. My family is stumped.

Kick Jokes More Kick Jokes

What do you get when you mix human DNA with goat DNA?

Kicked out of the petting zoo.

Why did they kick Raggedy Anne out of the toybox?

She kept on sitting on Pinocchio's face yelling "Lie to me... lie to me!"